What a day!

Today was my oldest daughter’s birthday party. She had a good time. One of her friends was able to come early; they had several hours before the party to play. A couple friends that live in the complex came early to play too.


We live in a townhome community. Which means we have other townhomes around us, a parking lot etc. We have a gated patio area but the kids were playing in the grassy area between our group of homes. Ellie and Kaden were out playing with the girls and it was just a few minutes before everyone was to get there. Nathan and I were doing last minute things inside when I asked Nate to check on the kids. I go check on them often when Ellie is playing with them. She had earlier in the day tried to run into the parking lot because she was being chased and doesn’t really know better. So I tell Nate to check on her that I am not sure if she is in or out. I start calling out for her in the house and he is looking outside. I realize that no one sees her so I go out and start looking. I tell all the girls that I don’t know where she is and everyone runs off looking. I double check the house again and then I run out and start walking up the parking lot toward the entrance of the complex and see a woman all the way at the end of the turn walking back holding Ellie’s hand. So I quickly walk up to her, she lets Ellie go and she runs the last couple steps to me and wants up. She doesn’t seem concerned at all. I said something to the woman about I can’t believe she was way over here and she tells me “Yea she almost made it to the entrance”, (I hope she was exaggerating), which is where the cars come in from the main road. I said “Oh my gosh, really” and then I say “thank you” (embarrassed and ashamed) and walk away holding my baby. I know I looked like the moron mom that can’t keep track of her kids today. The lady just kind of looked at me. I guess it’s never happened to her. It’s never happen to me either… before today. I feel awful about it. I think earlier today I still had the party to get through and lots going on. Ellie came in and fell asleep right after that so she slept through most of the party and I kept busy. Now that it’s all over though and it’s time to go to sleep I am just sick thinking about what could have happened. I can’t believe I am “that mom”. I mean we have all heard stories of kids being found out by roads or getting hit by cars. I am that overly cautious type. I always stay with my kids on playgrounds and on field trips. I hold their hands at events and through parking lots. My kids stay right in front of the house so I can see who they are with and what they are doing. I get grief for being too protective. I can’t believe I let this happen!

I feel bad for Meghan too. She always begs for Ellie to go out so I tell her ok but you need to watch her and let me know if I need to get her. I also, like I said check on her every few minutes and leave the door open so I can hear what’s going on. Meghan is usually great about it but today she had too many people around and was distracted, like me. I really didn’t expect her to have to do anything today but I didn’t know Ellie would take off either. I assumed that Ellie would want to be with everyone else. Plus she had never left before. Meghan felt really bad and was crying. I had to comfort her and let her know it was NOT her fault. Luckily she calmed down before the party began and she didn’t seem to be upset or thinking about it at all during the party. She hasn’t brought it up again so I think she is fine. Kids are so resilient.

I know that Ellie won’t be going outside of the gate anymore. I am thankful that someone found her before she got any further and came back our direction. (Maybe she saw the balloons and assumed that’s where she came from?). I, Thank God, that He was watching out for her today when I so horribly failed.


Sigh…